【Й╊羽翼双贺之庞龙咆哮╅Ю】 My Awesome Lord,I would always obey your commandments,even If I did wrong in this world,please forgive me!

今儿早11：20才起床，但是12点就要打工了，于是没有吃早饭，就直接去上班了。

于是在打工的时候，我就开始思考最近的生活，一边想，一边饿着肚子……

一想，我来英国都快要3年了，我却每天按部就班地生活着，偶尔旅游一下，偶尔出去逛逛街，和朋友们吃吃饭，每周末和教会的朋友们去运动打打球…… Despite this ，就是学校的生活了，论文，Exhibitions, Interviews, 还有考试。接着就是打工，赚钱，时间久了，心里就渐渐空虚起来……

生活难道就是这样吗？我每天这样忙碌，学习，打工都是为了什么呢？其实身边的朋友们，兄弟姊妹们也不都是这样吗？只不过，各自都有自己不同的生活方向和目标！至于我，我其实很清楚啊 ！我现在这样努力，为着是能够考到有奖学金的大学，英国的大学，或者美国的，然后读建筑学，因为我想要做建筑设计师，然后呢？……再然后就是挣多多的钱，把父母都接到身边，然后开好车，穿名牌 ，住大房子，娶一个美丽贤惠的妻子？我不敢说每个人都有这样的期望，但是谁不曾有过类似的……如果真是这样，我觉得这可以表述成一个成功的生活，那么什么可以描述成一个有意义的生活呢？其实我并不是说住大房子，开名车的生活是没有意义的，但是我觉得人与人是那么的不同，那么自然他们将来的生活也应该是不同的，但是在这样的社会环境下，我们所追求的生活都在往一个点靠拢。金钱，地位和名利，要么就是欲望。其实如果我们能够发现每个Individual 的我们，内心深处deep down inside, 都有一个恩赐，而这个恩赐就是你自己独一无二的，它代表着你自身的特性与性格还有你的能力，它实实在在地章显着你最真实的追求，理想和冲动。但是往往我们因为客观的因素而改变我们的追求……所以可能最后some people会生活得不开心，没有喜乐。（我努力地概括了我的思考which was happening at我饿得时候）

刚放假，我去参加了为期一周的Summer School 在Newcastle University. 玩得巨开心，也学了很多。在上周星期四的晚上，我们所有summer school的学生，来到Newcastle一家非常posh的大酒店里举行了一场 Formal Ball,为此，我还特地去买了一套“Formal Wear”. 我原本是一个很保守的人，本来穿那么正式的衣服去吃饭，我就抖得厉害，更别提去跳舞。这是我平生第一次参加舞会，我感觉我就是一个十足的土鳖，于是一点儿信心都没有，但最终我还是特别地痛苦的去了，因为我们住在大学宿舍里，我们要在大厅里集合，然后乘coach  去酒店，当我洗完澡，换好衣服后，脸就憋得通红，实在是不敢出门，于是我打电话给我们group里一个关系和我挺好的女生，说我很羞，不敢出门，然后还得一个人走过长长过道，她用鼓励的口吻回答我说：“Awww!  Don’t worry ！！De, if you wait for me like couple of mins, I will see you outside, we can walk together to the hall。”………………到了吃饭的地点，我的感觉渐渐好起来了，因为很饿，也想不了那么多，即使是在280人之多的大厅里. 于是我们吃了相当posh的chicken breast dinner. 就当我刚享受完dessert , 所有的大吊灯霎时间全部熄灭，我也很快意识到就在我们用餐的时候，有好几个侍者把大厅中央的长桌偷偷地搬走了，然现在就成了一个大舞池，音乐也顿时震耳欲聋地想起，所有人也疯了一样刷得全部跳起来扭向舞池中央。然而我的胃里却开始翻江倒海地痉挛起来，这时有好几个人的手在我的背后用力一推，我也挤进了人堆，我简直是无比尴尬和惊恐，我那几个同班的朋友在我前方喊我：De ！De！ De！COME HERE! 我就拼命地游了过去。然后和他们尴尬地挤在一起 ，真得是实在太尴尬了，每个人都特别舒服地扭动着，而我就像个机器人一样偶尔动那么一下，然后音乐换了，所有人就跟着换了位置，此刻我们跳着围了一圈，又在这时，一个可恨的手把我用力地那么无情地推了一把，我就顺势踉跄地跑到中间，我想我的脸那时就像一个红太阳。我试图突破他们这个圈，但是每当我要挤出去的时候，又被他们给推回来，于是我的神经就在此时崩溃了，而这时候的曲子好像是那种非常有节奏的R&B，不知道怎么了，我一下子就疯狂起来，于是，我就开始不顾一切地扭，当然是跟着节奏扭…然后一个带着钢牙套的金发男生也跑到中间，抱着我的腰开始跳贴身舞，因为当时兴奋得忘却了一切，我也就跟着他一上一下，一前一后，一左一右得跳着，我还记得我当时听见我朋友们一起喊着我的名字： De He De He De He, 然后 其他人也跟着叫我的名字……哇……，那叫一个cool!! 哈哈哈，后来不知跳了多久，歌不知换了多少……我去洗手间的时候都几乎要耳鸣了！结束后，我们在外面排队上车，很多女生抢着要和我拍照（不是我自恋，她们还掐我屁股呢），反正舞都跳了，我也放胆搂着她们一起照，还和那个我有点fancy的女生也拍了照。…………

哇……真是不敢相信……我当时可以那么疯狂……这应该是我很难忘的经历了…………

Hey! Guys, now I came back to the Newcastle and you know it was wonderful for coming back to previous place and living. It might cover many nice memories. Also lovely faces will be appear in ur heart, HeiHei. so remarkable, hum?

Well. To be honest, I DID MISS LOTS OF U VERY MUCH.

I still could remember the days we were riding, so missed. I was wondering that if I can be in the campus to have beef curry rice and sit cross-legged, lol.

HeyHeyHey, my dearest sis-Penguin, I missed u a lot.I m desperately that ask u for speaking to me about more knowledge u ve known. I do love philosophy. And did u remember that we were discussing about democratically problems, I knew I was so revering you sis.

LOL, and lovely little gal-Zed, you are the most funny sis of mine. I did miss that we went to take part in the English Conner. And we also pretended that we are couple, lol. Your English is Brilliant, and I ve never seen any Chinese people who speaks such standard American English. BUT I DO PREFER British accent, ( try to imagine my phiz lololol look down upon sb)

Most Honest-Faithful-loyal Bro of mine-Qiao Mu. I mean looks. And the other parts of heart I shall give to Jesus to Judge it, lolol. You always are cool, briefly thinking, and speeches, also statements which are sort of sense of humor. To be with u at the very moment, I felt such happy time and enjoyed it very indeed.

And the others also, here I do thank all of you for taking much happiness to me during the time I back to Beijing.LOL, thank u PKU. You brought many cute memories also. I love the “一塔湖图”“百x纪念讲堂”“地学楼”“燕南”“物美”“三角地”

Here is Thanks Ending.

My life starts very newly in Newcastle again. It’s very fresh and lonely, because of missing u guys. But anyway now I M still sitting here and writing thanks to u.

I jumped to the A-level straightly and it means I m going to fit with more works and pressures.

I chose Advanced Double Maths and Art-line Design & Photography in A-Level, also English Qualification and Sciences in GCSE.

I M EXCITED TO MY NEW TERM BEGINNING. Actually I got many confidents on it, so I was hurry about school starts.

Most lovely thing is to travel in Lake District, It’s was very Beautiful and Peaceful. You know what, this time I back, Eugene-previously guardian who took me to join Keswick Bible Convention in Lake District.(and pics are below)

What was happening was I went to HSBC and open my own bank account by myself. It’s cool.cos I was a bit angry there is none accompany with me.

Hey, here is worldly earthly desire of mine is that I want to eat 水煮鱼。

你们知道吗，我有多么渴望去郭林家常菜。哪怕是家园我也愿意。或者学五……

还有五道口的韩国菜们。哎呀，真是丫想死我了……

想你们的 小龙

生活的方向，人生的自由。

等待了我将近半年的光阴，签证也终于拿到手了。即将要回到Newcastle了，只是新的一轮挑战和生活的压力将要面临。但是这是我自己的选择，既然已做好准备去面对，那么剩下的就是平和的心态与坚强的意志了。

对于人情世故，我也已经厌倦了……分离得痛苦，新鲜环境得尝试，社交圈地扩大，这世俗得一切仿佛变的清晰而又模糊……

人生的每一个阶段都在经历了痛苦与磨难之后而会变得刚强起来，我相信水至清则无鱼，而我就好似这个说的一样……

There are too many people I loved missed and met. And I don’t know if somehow I leave them and get into another space and live, so what it is like?

I am the Teddy Bear of Zed

I am the Xiao Long of PKU fellowship.

I am the hope and son of my Father and Mother.

Am I a child of God?

I hope love changes everything, so that it gonna be easy to live.

This is my last time to write blog in Beijing I think!